Fuck what a Shit

Was away and not feeling comfortable at all.
Got back home – Laid down.

I need a #2!
It was huge.
Okay, after a while, another 1 (2!)!
Huge as well, drops of blood on t.p..
Err.. Oh well, yeah, it was the second huge one I dropped today!
Then… the unthinkable.
A turd… third!
Yet another huge load, this time less hard, and dripaly.
So put some tp between in there.

Now… the first one, I was looking at a Danica Patrick pic and, had I been remotely alone would have lost one over her probably.
Second, likewise.
The drips of blood, Danica gets visits from her Auntie!
Thinking stuff like –
Danica, keep the pressure on..!
Team, I have a leak…
Does she just let it go into her racing overalls!!?
Or is she on the Pill?
Sponsor Danica, when she’s ‘wounded’.
She only has an open wound…

Yesterday! I had another #2 thinking of Sporty Sally Nugent.
Pooping as a Sport?
Noises are minus points, ‘smelly’ gestures and not washing your hands immediate DSQ!

I mean, 3 such huge loads(/turds)!

Recently, I was shocked at Sonali from bbc SPORT to retweet … ‘between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit’.
Both to me.
Hers took about 35 minutes.
Helen Skelton, who follows Caitlin Moran, who writes the shit out of fuck ,/apparently/, took 46 minutes and 1 second.

Okay, like –

Who would not be DSQ’d when not washing her hands?
Ellie Harrison.
Victoria Justice.
Ariana Grande.
Elisabeth Gillies.
Mohini CBBC.
Maria Sharapova.
Danica Patrick.
Helen Skelton.
Ellie Crisell.

Helen Skelton on her Amazone Journey –
You’re gonna cut the crap, right!?
Crew: No, we leave it in , just like when you puked!
Anyone else think she was on her period?
Asked to much of her body!?

I actually posted the loads on http://www.sex.com but suddenly everything was gone! (girlwipes)

Finally, I was planning to pray to God and go for a walk and get the system going and it would make for a great… product?
So instead, I thank the Lord and I guess, this was it!

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